I know most bloggers like to paint a rosy picture of their lives; all the good bits and none of the bad stuff. But the last few months have drained me physically and emotionally and I've reached the point where I can say, no, I'm not ok. I'm so tired one hour at the gym feels like a marathon, and I count down the hours till I can escape work. I've done no sewing, and no gardening lately, because I just don't have the energy.
We were so hopeful at Christmas that my grandma was recovering well and would get to go home. She has gone downhill the last few weeks and is no longer the grandma I recognise. She is an angry, tantrum-throwing woman who tried to physically attack my mum last night. The only option now is high-level, full-time care.
The constant reminders of Valentines Day tomorrow are a kick in the guts...I'd been looking forward to spending it with someone I thought was pretty special. It's one thing to know you don't belong together, it's another to be ok with it.
And I discovered yesterday that my boss is using me as his 'fall guy'. He is blaming me for something that I have it in writing that he asked me to do. It's not the first time and it probably won't be the last, but I'm not sure whether to say something to HR or sit on it for now.
So I'm wrecked. The good news is I won a Liberty giveaway which I'm very excited about, and I'm escaping north for the weekend. The break will do me the world of good and hopefully I'll be back here next week with a smile on my face.
9 comments:
I hope things will get better for you. Enjoy your break!
I feel for you, it is horrible being on a downer. Make the most of your time away, as for your boss I would let him now that you are aware of what he is doing and suggest that you both go to HR and let them deal with it. Bullying, because that is what he is doing, needs to be stamped on.
Take care of yourself, have some "me" time.
No one's life is bright and shiny all the time. We all deal with issues in different ways and it's actually okay to feel less than chipper. You'll find a path through your troubles.
Hi Kate. Pam suggested some good advice. I hope you enjoy your weekend away. Good on you for being brave and honest. That takes a lot of strength.
Enjoy your time away and take care of yourself. Some weeks just suck!
Oh Dear, recharge the batteries over the weekend, some of the problems may be viewed with not so tired eyes
good luck with it all, make sure your have time for you
Sorry to hear you are feeling so crap. It must be very hard for your family to deal with what is happening to your grandma.and then you have to deal with a bullying boss. No wonder you are feeling overwhelmed. I hope your mini vacay up north will be a nice break for you. Fingers crossed you have decent weather.
Kate, this is all awful. Some of this stuff is way out of your control and some of it isn't.
I'm pleased for you that you are having an escape weekend. Sometimes getting away can give us a bit of perspective in our lives.
As for your idiot boss, I don't think you have to take it. You have the proof; use it. If he stays and your okay with working there, then make sure that everything is documented, because he sounds like a prize d*ckhead.
Enjoy your break and well done for you for putting it out there. Hopefully just sharing has made a difference.
Cheers
Totally agree with the others, Brodies Law is all about bullying in the workplace, you don't have to put up with it!
I'm so sorry to hear about your Grandma, it must be horrible to see a dramatic change in her. Sometimes life sucks and we need to take time out to recharge and get everything back on track, just remember its your life and you are in control of your own destiny!
Big Hugs
Jo
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