I know most bloggers like to paint a rosy picture of their lives; all the good bits and none of the bad stuff. But the last few months have drained me physically and emotionally and I've reached the point where I can say, no, I'm not ok. I'm so tired one hour at the gym feels like a marathon, and I count down the hours till I can escape work. I've done no sewing, and no gardening lately, because I just don't have the energy.
We were so hopeful at Christmas that my grandma was recovering well and would get to go home. She has gone downhill the last few weeks and is no longer the grandma I recognise. She is an angry, tantrum-throwing woman who tried to physically attack my mum last night. The only option now is high-level, full-time care.
The constant reminders of Valentines Day tomorrow are a kick in the guts...I'd been looking forward to spending it with someone I thought was pretty special. It's one thing to know you don't belong together, it's another to be ok with it.
And I discovered yesterday that my boss is using me as his 'fall guy'. He is blaming me for something that I have it in writing that he asked me to do. It's not the first time and it probably won't be the last, but I'm not sure whether to say something to HR or sit on it for now.
So I'm wrecked. The good news is I won a Liberty giveaway which I'm very excited about, and I'm escaping north for the weekend. The break will do me the world of good and hopefully I'll be back here next week with a smile on my face.